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You are here: Home / Life / Divorce / Why I’m Not Sending Out Christmas Cards This Year

Why I’m Not Sending Out Christmas Cards This Year

December 16, 2014 By anotherjennifer 8 Comments

I’m not sending out Christmas cards this year. It just seems contrived at this point.

It has nothing to do with the fact that I finalized a divorce this year. I’m doing great. More than great, really.

The holidays aren’t stressing me out.

It just seems like every year I race to find the perfect family photo to send out to a long list of people I barely talk to anymore.

I stopped posing my photos years ago. Because posing kids and dogs together is mild torture.

I’ve pared my mailing list down the last couple of years. Because when do I even talk to most of these people? And how many even send me cards?

And then there’s that guilty feeling I get when I throw out all those pretty cards I do receive with cute photos of children and families straight into the trash in January.

Those photo cards aren’t cheap, though my blog provided my cards last year.

If I’ve learned anything this year it’s to appreciate the love I have all around me every day. While I try to give in some way every day, I’ve also become more deliberate about telling people what they mean to me. I have so much good in my life that I want to celebrate it every day.

Being mindful and stopping to smell the roses always sounds good in theory, but how often do we actually do it? Looking back at the photos from our summer (while making a calendar for 2015, a tradition I am continuing), my boys and I determined that it was pretty epic. We had some fun adventures, many of which were not planned ahead of time. Many involved later bedtimes than normal. Many were documented with selfies from my iPhone.

I think about the adventures I’ve had with friends new and old this year. The conversations I’ve had. Deep conversations. The tears and laughter. The times I’ve felt my heart was so full it would burst. Or when I felt emotion so deep I couldn’t help but cry. These are the things you can’t express with a photocard ordered online.

I’d rather spend time with and talk to those that are important in my life. I’d rather concentrate on meaningful interactions with people I care about rather than send a blanket message because it’s expected.

I donated the money I would have used to purchase the cards instead. As I’ve done in previous years, I’m concentrating on gifts for the kiddos in my life who call me Mom or Auntie. This makes the holiday season of “giving” much easier and more meaningful for me.

I write about simple ways to give back every day. If we truly appreciate the love we have around us every day, the holiday season wouldn’t seem so stressful and crazy.

Of course, I’m not going to judge you if you are sending out Christmas cards. This is simply a decision I made that felt right for me. I know people who get a lot of joy from sending out cards. And I do very much appreciate those that have taken the time to ask me for my new address so that they can send me a card.

Instead I’ll give you my own version of a holiday card right here. It’s a selfie from our epic summer. With a few festive embellishments.

happyholidays2014

 Are you sending holiday cards this year?

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Filed Under: Divorce, Life, Parenting, Perspective, Philanthropy Tagged With: Christmas, holiday photo cards, holiday stress, love

Meet Jennifer

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Jennifer Iacovelli is a blogger, copywriter, author, consultant, speaker, do-gooder, single mother, lefty, pie-hater, bacon-lover, Syracuse alum, Maine dweller and lover of life.  Read More…

Comments

  1. Janine Huldie says

    December 16, 2014 at 6:31 am

    I love that you aren’t sending out cards this year and now wish I didn’t either after having to be told I left off someone who wasn’t on my list from last year (as they must not have sent to me last year) but clearly had to call my MIL complaining that I didn’t originally send to them this year. So I did them one now, but definitely is in times like this more aggravation then it is worth. Might have to think about going your route next year.
    Janine Huldie recently posted..Don’t Be Scared, Be Prepared – Mylan Specialty & Life Threatening AllergiesMy Profile

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  2. Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life says

    December 16, 2014 at 7:34 am

    I wanted to send Christmas cards this year. I had a professional picture taken this summer that I was going to use. But you know what, none of my kids look thrilled in it, and I’m still scrambling to get my shopping done. This is two years in a row I didn’t get things done. Maybe I’ll get a great picture over the break and send out a Valentine’s Day card. Who knows. But I am not going to stress about it. It seems like the amount of cards I am getting has gone down…maybe I was taken off the list for not sending them last year?
    Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life recently posted..Cookie Exchange Recipes: 30 Fun and Festive Sweet TreatsMy Profile

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    • Tamara says

      December 16, 2014 at 10:53 pm

      Next time you need me to do the family portrait! I’ll bring Des so the kids will look happy looking at his goofy face.
      Tamara recently posted..Hey Guys, It’s Flat Tamara.My Profile

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  3. Leah Twitchell says

    December 16, 2014 at 11:00 am

    Thank you so much for writing this. This is exactly how I feel these days about sending out cards. If your only connection with someone is a once-a-year obligatory card, then what is that even about??? It is a lovely tradition, but only when if feels right.
    Leah Twitchell recently posted..Giving Back: Kennebec Valley Humane SocietyMy Profile

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  4. Ashlee says

    December 16, 2014 at 3:28 pm

    Being mindful and stopping to smell the roses always sounds good in theory, but how often do we actually do it? <– I always say something similar in my head to ensure I stop and smell the roses often, so to speak. Our world today takes a lot of our focus on every day things, being in the moment and small appreciations. It feels so good to focus on those things and bring the joy of them back into your every day lives.

    I did actually send out Christmas cards this year for the first time. I've been wanting to do it for the past two years and finally made it happen… I'm glad I waited. The previous two years I would have blown too much money on them. Now that I model part-time, I have photographer friends that gave me a great deal and I had a lot of fun putting everything together. I think no matter what you do, as long as you're having fun and doing it for the right reasons, it's okay in my book.
    Ashlee recently posted..The Importance Of Vitamin D During WinterMy Profile

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  5. Bev says

    December 16, 2014 at 6:25 pm

    I have yet to send out holiday cards and this post made me feel better about not doing it. I’d rather spend the time I’d use with them with friends or family anyway 🙂
    Bev recently posted..I’ve (almost) survived my first holiday seasonMy Profile

    Reply
  6. Stephanie says

    December 16, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    This is the second year I haven’t sent them. I have always loved sending them in the past and we keep the ones we get up on a wall in our kitchen for the whole year – until we start getting new ones. (Believe it or not – it is probably one of the most visited and talked about areas of our house when we have friends over. “Who is this?” and “Where are they?” all through the year. For some reason I just can’t get it together to send them. Unfortunately it really is my loss, my wall of cards is definitely diminishing due to my lack of participation.
    Stephanie recently posted..How to Take Photos of FireworksMy Profile

    Reply
  7. Tamara says

    December 16, 2014 at 10:52 pm

    We used to do it all up and send out really nerdy ones. Like us superimposed on Star Wars backgrounds.
    Not sure why we stopped, but I think it just lost some of its magic. It was hard, and expensive.
    Obviously I love getting them, and the ones sent to me with photos I have taken? Like magic.
    Tamara recently posted..Hey Guys, It’s Flat Tamara.My Profile

    Reply

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Jennifer Iacovelli is a blogger, copywriter, author, consultant, speaker, do-gooder, single mother, lefty, pie-hater, bacon-lover, Syracuse alum, Maine dweller and lover of life.  Read More…

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