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Trimming the Tree and the Christmas Card List

jennifer · December 9, 2013 · 22 Comments

I’m tired of the stress that comes with the holidays. All the rushing around to buy presents. Decorating the house. Finding the perfect photo for the Christmas card. Remembering to move Elfie every night. Cookie swaps.
Seriously, what is up with the cookie swaps?
I’ve made it a point to stress less around the holiday season. I wait until after Thanksgiving and Biz’s birthday to even think about Christmas. I make every attempt to shop with a conscience.
Heck, it’s December 9th, and I’ve barely started to shop for presents.
I try and take this time of year step by step. After traveling for the Thanksgiving holiday / Biz’s birthday, I took out the Christmas decorations and starting putting some up. I bought my wreaths on #GivingTuesday from Crossroads, a nonprofit I work with here in Maine (proceeds go to a patient scholarship fund). This weekend, we picked out a beautiful tree and trimmed it.

christmas tree
I love decorating an old home for the holidays!

Last night, I did something I’ve wanted to do for a few years now. I cut my Christmas card list in half. I did this mainly because I opted to get nicer cards this year from Minted that are a bit more expensive. They are higher quality than the typical cards we order and were created by indie designers. They are gorgeous.
Though I received a credit for a post I wrote on Minted and could have easily paid a small amount to order what I normally would, I decided that it was time to trim down my list of card recipients.
It seems like every year I send out cards, I question if it’s worth the time, effort and money. I swear some of the people on my list assume I dropped off the face of the Earth when I moved to Maine 13 years ago.
I’m also going to assume that the people I cut out of my list don’t read this blog. They certainly don’t send me any cards. It’s not that we don’t like each other, it’s just that we aren’t really as significant in each other’s lives anymore. And that’s perfectly okay. Time goes by. People change. Our lives are different.
Christmas Balls
This photo was taken in NYC a couple weeks before Christmas in 2010.

I don’t know why I’ve felt the need to send cards to so many people for so many years, but it felt good to trim that list. And it was a lot easier than I thought it would be.
I think my next step is to convince some of the adults in my life that it’s really not necessary to exchange gifts at all. I’d rather spend some good quality time with those people than worry about buying a present. Even presents that are meaningful and/or give back.
After that, I’ll work on convincing G that he doesn’t need a lock on his bedroom door to keep his brother out. That might be harder than trimming my Christmas card list.

Do you stress over sending out Christmas cards? When’s the last time you trimmed down your list?

p.s. My article on GOOD.is, Five Simple Ways to Shop with a Conscience This Holiday, was featuring in a daily email newsletter from GOOD and named the conversation starter of the week. Thanks to all of you who read, shared and commented on the article!

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Life, Parenting Biz, Christmas, Christmas card list, G, holiday stress, Minted

Comments

  1. The Dose of Reality says

    December 9, 2013 at 7:16 am

    We are having parallel holiday seasons this year! I haven’t even really started shopping (I’m still getting lists together for everyone). I took the kids’ picture on Saturday and ordered my cards…and I did the SAME THING. I cut my list totally in half. It’s exactly as you said, we’re just not in those people’s lives anymore and that’s okay. I don’t know why I kept sending out cards to such a big group either…I think it was just habit!
    If you figure out the adult “let’s not exchange gift” thing, I will be so impressed (and I will want your secret). I JUST got my sister in law to go to a “let’s just do the kids only” approach this year and I was thrilled…I’d like to do that with a few more people, too!! –Lisa

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 8:54 pm

      I think you’re exactly right, Lisa. It’s a habit to just send out a ton of cards. It’s funny how adults are skeptical about not exchanging gifts, as if they won’t have a real Christmas or something. The focusing on the kids angle seems to work well!

      Reply
  2. Ginny Marie says

    December 9, 2013 at 7:40 am

    I am so with you! I’ve barely started shopping for gifts, too, but that’s me every year. I do like to send out a Christmas letter with our card, but it’s usually late. And my brother and sisters have been talking about not buying gifts for the adults, which also suits me! I love your article on GOOD!

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 9:00 pm

      I’m so glad you liked the article! I don’t really even see the point of adults exchanging gifts, unless it’s a truly special someone. When there are kids involved, who can afford all the presents? I’d rather spend some good quality time with them.

      Reply
  3. Alexa says

    December 9, 2013 at 8:07 am

    I am starting to believe that we are soul twins! I am over the gajillion Christmas cards (I’ve started basically sending them to the people that I got one from!!!) My Christmas shopping has been done for months (I shop sales throughout the year!) and I’ve put the kabosh (sp?) on buying for the adults in my family. This year, we are donating to a cause or causes of our choice, and we will explain our choices to the family. I like that much better.
    December is so crazy for us anyway. We have my birthday, Charis’s birthday, Kathryn’s day, my niece’s birthday, Ella’s birthday, my sister’s birthday, Christmas, my sis n law’s birthday… December just leaves me rolled up shaking in a corner somewhere… with a bottle of wine!
    Simple is better.

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 9:16 pm

      That’s awesome, Alexa. Well, the first paragraph. Not the one where you are shaking in a corner somewhere with a bottle of wine. Simple is way better!

      Reply
  4. Cyndi says

    December 9, 2013 at 8:41 am

    I’m bad. I haven’t sent cards…except maybe one year there awhile back. Not sure why…eh, I prefer to make phone calls, even though phone calls aren’t my thing, either. haha.
    Yeah, the stresses of this time of year do make me a little crazy. But, I love the idea of those Minted cards. Perhaps they’ll make me a Christmas-card sender, yet. 🙂

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 9:20 pm

      I feel like there’s some sort of obligation to send out cards if you have kids. When did that happen? My Minted cards are awesome. If you don’t send cards, you should definitely submit some artwork to the Minted community!

      Reply
  5. Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama says

    December 9, 2013 at 9:43 am

    I finally made a dent in my shopping list last night with a gigantic Amazon order. But I’m still way behind. I’m trimming my Christmas card list too.
    My family has a great gift-giving arrangement. We only buy for our nieces and nephews. The adults no longer exchange presents. It had gotten to the point that we were just exchanging gift cards. Silly! For our older nephews, we don’t buy them gifts anymore but instead do something with them. We’ve been to Cirque du Soleil, the Georgia Aquarium, and a Hawks game. It’s great to spend time with them since we don’t see them very often, and hopefully we’re building lasting memories.

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 9:21 pm

      I think you are definitely building lasting memories, Nicole. I love the idea of giving experiences. We’ll be taking our boys to Syracuse for a basketball game on New Year’s Eve this year. I’d say that beats out more Legos any day!

      Reply
  6. Michelle says

    December 9, 2013 at 10:11 am

    My list is huge. I don’t know if I will be doing any trimming this year though, because I may not be sending a card until late or at all. I never got my kids together for a picture, so I am not sure it’s going to happen at this point. Maybe I will send a New Year’s card. Or maybe I will just take it off the agenda for the year. Is it so bad if I skip a year?

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 9:27 pm

      Honestly, I think people are so busy they probably won’t even notice you skipped! I was looking at my list last night and asking my husband if we even got cards from some of the people. We couldn’t remember!

      Reply
  7. Tamara says

    December 9, 2013 at 11:45 am

    This year is mostly stress free. No cards! No elf on the shelf. The money is hard, but I got two jobs to help pay for the holidays. That was actually necessary and next time I might try to get those jobs a little earlier to avoid the last minute rush.

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 9, 2013 at 9:34 pm

      This time of year is so expensive. What really matters is time together, if you ask me. Oh and really big awesome trees. 🙂

      Reply
  8. Chris Carter says

    December 10, 2013 at 11:02 am

    GOOD FOR YOU!!!! We stopped doing cards altogether… now we just put together an animoto video email and send that. I would spend HOURS on the cards and it was just a decision back a few years ago, made because of all the medical stress we were under with the kids….and me…etc.
    Each year I think about getting back to them, but I love love love that this is one project I choose to not mess with. It’s a bit of a disappointment, but the pay off is greater.

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 10, 2013 at 4:57 pm

      I love the idea of a video, Chris. How fun! Plus video seems like it’s even more personal. I’d love to see you in a video! 🙂

      Reply
  9. Ilene says

    December 10, 2013 at 9:37 pm

    I have been huge on Christmas Cards for decades. I loved reaching out to old college room mates and old friends just to drop a line and say hello. It was a pretty important tradition for me. I didn’t send out cards last year – the timing was just wrong for me. I thought for sure I would send out cards this year, especially since we had moved. But again, I am skipping them all together. I’ve found – similar to you – that the people I want to be in touch with, I will be in touch with, regardless of what season it is. The cards would be nice but don’t feel entirely necessary.

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 11, 2013 at 9:29 pm

      That’s what I think, Ilene. I’m going to see the people I want to see. Why stress out about sending a bunch of cards each year?

      Reply
  10. Krystal says

    December 11, 2013 at 2:59 pm

    I haven’t done the Christmas Card thing in years! I couldn’t handle the craziness of it all. Thanks to Facebook it is a lot easier though because I just post a holiday picture and voila! Just did that today actually 🙂

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 11, 2013 at 9:30 pm

      There are definitely a lot of good alternatives out there. FB and email can be a lot easier!

      Reply
  11. Leah.Davidson says

    December 12, 2013 at 10:23 pm

    My list has gotten slimmer over the years too and I’m good with that. We also have cut out adult gift exchanges all together – and that eases the stress and helps with all the expense too!

    Reply
    • anotherjennifer says

      December 15, 2013 at 10:20 am

      I’ve done the same with the adult gifts. I’d rather have a nice dinner with friends some night than worry about buying a gift!

      Reply

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